Synergy Counselling

For Men. male face

Therapy notes for men - emotional coaching and counselling service

For many men feelings are confusing and even frightening. Most men when asked how they feel will respond with words like, ‘normal’, alright’ and ‘fine’, which usually doesn’t describe what they are actually feeling. Men have been taught to keep emotions under control and have often not gained the skills to understand what they are feeling. So when men are hit by an emotional crisis like a failure of a relationship, unemployment, anxiety attack, loss of confidence or energy, it can often feel like they are ‘losing it’.

If you are presently struggling with an emotional issue or would like to work towards emotional fitness then please take some time to read further information on this site and make contact with Synergy if you would like us to support you.

“It is possible to come across as bullish, argumentative, forceful, mouthy and
yet be absolutely crippled emotionally”
Brian Moore ex England Rugby player)

For Men. Library Image: Reaching Hands (Sml)

The benefits of building emotional muscles

Many men are interested in building their bodies and building their brains but few are interested in building their emotional muscles. At Synergy we believe when time is spent in building emotional fitness with an emotional coach (eq coach) or counsellor the pay offs are enormous. By becoming emotionally fit men can take more control of their lives, increase communication skills, and build more satisfying relationships, becoming a better father and friend and increasing the ability to change behaviour. When men become more emotionally intelligent they are able to take responsibility for their emotions and behaviour.

For an on-going discussion on men's emotional fitness go to One Minute Man

The top 10 reasons men seek counselling at Synergy

Relational difficulties
Anger management and lack of emotional control
Depression, stress, anxiety and shame
Work place issues including bullying, confidence and work/life balance
Sex, sexuality and masculinity issues
Loss of confidence and low self-esteem
Emotional numbness
Lack of connection with their father and mother
Addiction and substance abuse
Trauma, abuse and loss

For Men. Library Image: Depressed Man

Messages men hear - Preventing male emotional fitness

Traditional masculinity has set certain benchmarks for what it means to be a man, failing to live up to this 'male code' can damage chances of belonging. These messages have been taught from birth with phrases such as 'be strong', 'be tough', 'big boys don't cry', 'you’re the man of the house', 'be a real man', and 'be a brave little soldier'. Most boys have had to learn how to survive by joining in with the game. This has often left men with a huge burden to prove that they are fit to belong to this dominant form of masculinity. When most men are asked what it means to be a man, most will say things like, be strong, be tough and be cool. However in working with a broad range of men, what I have discovered is that most men feel the opposite of these things, they often feel powerless inside, lonely, isolated and fear humiliation.

Male Messages - the unwritten rules that many men live by.

Big boys don’t cry
Don’t ask for help
Stay in control
Be strong, be tough and show no weakness
Show limited physical affection to your friends
Do not show love or tenderness
Stay on top - winning is all there is!
Bullying and teasing are normal male communication
Be rational and logical at all times
Show no feelings except anger
Sourced from Men In Therapy - Meth & Pasick

For Men. men at work

Men from all walks of life use Synergy services

Men from all walks of life, cultures and sexualities between the ages of 18- 75 access Synergy services. These men may be unemployed, off sick or employed in the following professions and include doctors, electricians, CEO’s, plumbers, IT Consultants, plasterers, security guards, nurses, ex-servicemen, policemen, hairdressers, factory operatives, teachers, builders, professional footballers, cameramen, engineers, physiotherapists, coaches, students, lecturers, taxi drivers and office workers.

"Top quality - I couldn't have dreamed of anything better"
Comment from previous client

Synergy services for men

At Synergy we are pleased to have developed a specialised men’s emotional fitness programme and can provide the following services

Counselling/'eq coach' service - £60-£70 per session
MOT - 60 minute emotional fitness assessment £110
Basic service - MOT + 2 further sessions £240
Anger package - 5 sessions paid in advance £275- £325

© 2020 James Hawes - Synergy counselling text

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